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(yes, I'm loving it)
Sep. 18th, 2012 08:21 amMy new job is at a publishing house, in a building which is a converted railway shed.
Perfect metaphor for my career, really.
Perfect metaphor for my career, really.
typical day at the office...
Aug. 24th, 2011 05:30 pmToday I acquired an instant disability!
I became incapable of walking, travelled from my workplace to Footscray, and was suddenly, miraculously, cured - while one of my colleagues was afflicted with the same instant-onset disability, and staggered into the scooter I'd just got out of...
Yes, folks, it's DISABILITY AWARENESS time at work, and we had a session learning about disability access issues on public transport. We divided into groups (scooters, wheelchairs, blindness) and travelled round the city. And it's really tricky.
There were no signs near the lifts, no turning space on some of the trains, no way to validate our tram tickets... The whole experience was very fascinating, and made me even more enthused about fixing accessibility issues.
Hurrah for legs! *walks anywhere and everywhere*
I became incapable of walking, travelled from my workplace to Footscray, and was suddenly, miraculously, cured - while one of my colleagues was afflicted with the same instant-onset disability, and staggered into the scooter I'd just got out of...
Yes, folks, it's DISABILITY AWARENESS time at work, and we had a session learning about disability access issues on public transport. We divided into groups (scooters, wheelchairs, blindness) and travelled round the city. And it's really tricky.
There were no signs near the lifts, no turning space on some of the trains, no way to validate our tram tickets... The whole experience was very fascinating, and made me even more enthused about fixing accessibility issues.
Hurrah for legs! *walks anywhere and everywhere*
Currently having issues at work dealing with a... um... lightsaber factory. (Does that work?)
The lightsaber people are, rightfully, fairly concerned about workplace safety. So they've developed some really comprehensive guidelines for working in their factory, that everyone has to follow no matter what.
Unfortunately, the term "work" is pretty all-encompassing.
"Working" at the factory could mean that you're doing product testing to make sure that the lightsabers can cut through steel, remove limbs, and generally melt doors. Or it could mean that you're in the reception area, see a big poster of Luke Skywalker, and want to take a photo. As far as the safety guidelines are concerned, the two situations are both "work" and should therefore be treated exactly the same way.
Which basically means that I need to show up, get my saber-handling qualification, don my quantum shielding vest, set four guards to stand around me and make sure no-one can get close, turn on the big red flashing "Work In Progress! Danger!" sign, fill out a 3 page pre-work report, get the factory supervisor to sign off on it...
...and then take a photo of Luke Skywalker's poster.
We're trying to explain to the official safety guys why this is impractical, but so far we're not getting anywhere.
The lightsaber people are, rightfully, fairly concerned about workplace safety. So they've developed some really comprehensive guidelines for working in their factory, that everyone has to follow no matter what.
Unfortunately, the term "work" is pretty all-encompassing.
"Working" at the factory could mean that you're doing product testing to make sure that the lightsabers can cut through steel, remove limbs, and generally melt doors. Or it could mean that you're in the reception area, see a big poster of Luke Skywalker, and want to take a photo. As far as the safety guidelines are concerned, the two situations are both "work" and should therefore be treated exactly the same way.
Which basically means that I need to show up, get my saber-handling qualification, don my quantum shielding vest, set four guards to stand around me and make sure no-one can get close, turn on the big red flashing "Work In Progress! Danger!" sign, fill out a 3 page pre-work report, get the factory supervisor to sign off on it...
...and then take a photo of Luke Skywalker's poster.
We're trying to explain to the official safety guys why this is impractical, but so far we're not getting anywhere.
So, part of my job is investigating [Swords & Chivalry Ltd]'s invoice, to check that [Swords & Chivalry Ltd] are not charging us for items they haven't installed.
This involves going out to the location each item is supposed to be in, and finding out if it's there.
For instance, this month's invoice says that [Swords & Chivalry Ltd] have installed a whole lot of [laser-force raptor defence systems] at different train stations. So, I have to travel out to each train station, find the nearest [Swords & Chivalry Ltd] employee, and ask to see their [raptor defence system], to check if their [lasers] have been upgraded.
Several were missing. Hmm.
Got back to the office, called up [Swords & Chivalry Ltd], and asked where these invoiced [laser-force upgrades] were.
...apparently the [raptor defence project] had been "completed, but not commissioned". In other words, "we're allowed to put it in our invoice, even though it doesn't exist yet".
I told them very sternly that they can't do that. After all, it's a waste of my time. I had to spend all day sitting on a train reading a book, and all for nothing. I'm going to have to do it again next week, to check on the same stuff.
But then again, it's sitting on a train reading a book. I'm not too fussed about having to do it twice over.
This involves going out to the location each item is supposed to be in, and finding out if it's there.
For instance, this month's invoice says that [Swords & Chivalry Ltd] have installed a whole lot of [laser-force raptor defence systems] at different train stations. So, I have to travel out to each train station, find the nearest [Swords & Chivalry Ltd] employee, and ask to see their [raptor defence system], to check if their [lasers] have been upgraded.
Several were missing. Hmm.
Got back to the office, called up [Swords & Chivalry Ltd], and asked where these invoiced [laser-force upgrades] were.
...apparently the [raptor defence project] had been "completed, but not commissioned". In other words, "we're allowed to put it in our invoice, even though it doesn't exist yet".
I told them very sternly that they can't do that. After all, it's a waste of my time. I had to spend all day sitting on a train reading a book, and all for nothing. I'm going to have to do it again next week, to check on the same stuff.
But then again, it's sitting on a train reading a book. I'm not too fussed about having to do it twice over.
I spent the day trying to convince the rail operators to let me do my job. The same job, coincidentally, that I have been doing for four years so far without them noticing - but now that we've been polite enough to start pointing out that we're doing it, they've started panicking and declaring that it's UNSAFE and ILLEGAL and JUST PLAIN WRONG.
Several frustrating phonecalls later, I had to give up, go home, and hope that my boss can sort out the whole mess.
(No, I can't provide more detail.)
This evening was mainly occupied by The Road To Bethlehem: an event in which you wander round a field full of lots of very exciting props and people wearing the standard Biblical costumes, and watch bits of Christmas story happening (amazingly) right before your eyes.
We started with Mary talking to Gabriel about babies, then walked through a marketplace and got a census decreed at us (is decreed a word?) by Roman soldiers, then after a brief stint at Herod's palace, and an exciting encounter with shepherds (that would have been much more exciting if we'd been there after dark and had lightning flashes and angels appearing out of nowhere rather than lights flickering and the angels very obviously hiding behind the big black curtain), we went into Bethlehem and met the innkeepers, before meeting up with Mary and Joseph again...
My favourite bit was the guards at the Bethlehem gates - purely because they started counting the number of people in Roman numerals, and then confused themselves debating over where all the I's and V's were supposed to go.
Am now back at home, feeling exceedingly tired, and too lazy to get off this comfy couch and actually go to bed.
Several frustrating phonecalls later, I had to give up, go home, and hope that my boss can sort out the whole mess.
(No, I can't provide more detail.)
This evening was mainly occupied by The Road To Bethlehem: an event in which you wander round a field full of lots of very exciting props and people wearing the standard Biblical costumes, and watch bits of Christmas story happening (amazingly) right before your eyes.
We started with Mary talking to Gabriel about babies, then walked through a marketplace and got a census decreed at us (is decreed a word?) by Roman soldiers, then after a brief stint at Herod's palace, and an exciting encounter with shepherds (that would have been much more exciting if we'd been there after dark and had lightning flashes and angels appearing out of nowhere rather than lights flickering and the angels very obviously hiding behind the big black curtain), we went into Bethlehem and met the innkeepers, before meeting up with Mary and Joseph again...
My favourite bit was the guards at the Bethlehem gates - purely because they started counting the number of people in Roman numerals, and then confused themselves debating over where all the I's and V's were supposed to go.
Am now back at home, feeling exceedingly tired, and too lazy to get off this comfy couch and actually go to bed.
first as tragedy, then as farce
Dec. 13th, 2010 11:58 amMY RIDICULOUS MORNING: LET ME SHOW YOU IT.
My work this week involves a great deal of running around on rail reserves, looking at trees. Starting this morning.
This is how my morning was supposed to go:
1) Mez takes the train to Greensborough (40 minutes away).
2) Mez gets off the train, and calls Train Control.
3) "Hello?" "Hello. Is that Train Control?" "Yes." "Can I please go on the rail reserve and take lots of photos?" "Sure! Have fun!"
4) Mez puts on her orange safety vest, climbs over the railing onto the rail reserve, and takes lots of pretty pictures of vegetation.
5) Mez takes the train back into the city, and then out to another place, to do the same thing all over again.
( not according to plan )
*sighs*
At least it gave me a fun story...
My work this week involves a great deal of running around on rail reserves, looking at trees. Starting this morning.
This is how my morning was supposed to go:
1) Mez takes the train to Greensborough (40 minutes away).
2) Mez gets off the train, and calls Train Control.
3) "Hello?" "Hello. Is that Train Control?" "Yes." "Can I please go on the rail reserve and take lots of photos?" "Sure! Have fun!"
4) Mez puts on her orange safety vest, climbs over the railing onto the rail reserve, and takes lots of pretty pictures of vegetation.
5) Mez takes the train back into the city, and then out to another place, to do the same thing all over again.
( not according to plan )
*sighs*
At least it gave me a fun story...
I think I need a more obscure job description.
Went to a meeting yesterday, to prepare for another meeting. I was there because it was vaguely vegetation-related, and I do stuff with vegetation as part of my job. So, in our initial go-round-the-table-and-introduce-yourself, that's what I said.
Unfortunately, I'd forgotten that, in the entire department, I am pretty much the only person who has to deal with vegetation.
I am now in charge of a ten-minute presentation at the meeting, in which I will impart my Vast And Impressive Learnings Of Vegetation to the group we're dealing with.
(Said learnings have mostly been picked up by me reading random documents that landed on my desk, surfing websites about weeds, and having confusing conversations with people who use helicopter-mounted chainsaws and want to sell me things.)
*is suddenly rather nervous*
Went to a meeting yesterday, to prepare for another meeting. I was there because it was vaguely vegetation-related, and I do stuff with vegetation as part of my job. So, in our initial go-round-the-table-and-introduce-yourself, that's what I said.
Unfortunately, I'd forgotten that, in the entire department, I am pretty much the only person who has to deal with vegetation.
I am now in charge of a ten-minute presentation at the meeting, in which I will impart my Vast And Impressive Learnings Of Vegetation to the group we're dealing with.
(Said learnings have mostly been picked up by me reading random documents that landed on my desk, surfing websites about weeds, and having confusing conversations with people who use helicopter-mounted chainsaws and want to sell me things.)
*is suddenly rather nervous*
General Announcement
Sep. 13th, 2005 11:36 amAre you checking my tagged entries?
Everything's cross-posted from here to LJ, these days. But my earlier stuff wasn't.
If you're looking for a tagged entry from my LJ-only days, please look here.
Everything's cross-posted from here to LJ, these days. But my earlier stuff wasn't.
If you're looking for a tagged entry from my LJ-only days, please look here.
