doing well

May. 24th, 2022 11:50 am
deird1: Dawn drinking a milkshake (Dawn milkshake)
I have, unfortunately, failed to keep track of my flist. If you posted something important and I missed it... I'm sorry. Please let me know what it was!





This week is a very good one.

This week:
- we got a new Prime Minister!
- I finished my cancer treatment!
- I am turning 40!
- I will get to see Hamilton!

Now, if the board game I've ordered will hurry up and arrive already, it'll be the Best Week Ever.
deird1: Faith looking thoughtful, with text "deep thought" (Faith thought)
Writing this down so that I remember, as much as any other reason.


What happened in Melbourne last year

The year started off as usual, with hot sunny days, the beginning of school, and half the country on fire.

I got concerned enough about the smoke to purchase facemasks on the internet.

China had another weird virus again, and we all watched the YouTube videos of them killing time while stuck in their houses for weeks.


Then came the end of the world. (For reference see: every country in the whole world, around about March.)

and on it went )


Questions? Comments?
deird1: Dawn raising an eyebrow, with text "srsly?" (Dawn srsly)
Aussies really suck at prepping.

Apparently every supermarket in the entire country is now sold out of toilet paper. My local supermarket certainly is. They're also sold out of flour, spaghetti, rice, bread, and long-life milk.

They're not sold out of dried lentils/chickpeas/beans, or dried soup mix, or dried fruit, or canned vegetables/fruit.

Apparently everyone in Australia thinks that one should spend food shortages having nothing but plain white carbohydrates – in which case they'll all be so constipated that I'm not sure why they'll need so much toilet paper.

smoke!

Jan. 14th, 2020 03:33 pm
deird1: Dawn glaring at Buffy, with text "Dawn Summers demands an explanation for this bullshit" (Dawn bullshit)
The smoke in Melbourne is now bad enough that I've ordered reusable facemasks for the entire family. FUN.

Keeping the kids inside today, away from smoke and exercise. This involves lots of television. (The alternative would be the entire house getting torn apart by kidlets with too much energy.) A shame, but there it is.

Also, the sun is now at the point where you can look at it, eclipse-style. I've been closing curtains so that the kidlets don't stare and accidentally blind themselves...
deird1: Vimes lighting a cigar using a swamp dragon, with text "Fabricati Diem Pvnc" (Vimes)
The thing about Christmas in Australia is that all the Christmas stuff and all the end of school year breakup stuff is all happening at the same time.

I currently am going to kinder concerts, playgroup parties, next-year-at-school events, and miscellaneous end of the year events, and a whole bunch of Christmas get-togethers.

All while it's 36 degrees outside and Sydney is apparently still on fire.
deird1: Dawn glaring at Buffy, with text "Dawn Summers demands an explanation for this bullshit" (Dawn bullshit)
Australia, you had one job.

*sighs*
deird1: Joey and Pacey at the prom, with text "I remember everything" (Joey Pacey remember)
You step off the boat in Devonport, and lots of enterprising salesmen are standing right there, waving "Breakfast at our Cafe!" signs and gesturing to their joint down the street.

You step off the boat in Melbourne, and no-one cares. You want breakfast? Eh, so does everyone else. You got off a boat? Congratulations. People do that sometimes.

Melbourne: the city where nobody gives a damn. (And, for the first time in three weeks, I felt right at home.)


Our holiday can be neatly divided into a few different topics.
the old stuff )

the oops factor )

the natural stuff )

the kidlets )

the verdict )

Tassie!

Mar. 16th, 2019 05:11 pm
deird1: Fred squeeing, with love hearts (Fred squee)
We've just been booking our holiday. We're going to Tasmania!

You may recall, I live in Melbourne, which is about as close to Tasmania as you can get while being in a totally different state. So, rather than flying, we are taking the boat across (and thereby having our car for the entire holiday).

I haven't been to Tasmania since I was 11, so I'm very excited. We're going to do all the convicty bits, and a lot of nature-y bits too (waterfalls, caves, etc). We're not going to do any long walks, which is very disappointing - but our children have little legs and wouldn't manage to walk that far, so we figure we'll wait another decade and come back to climb some mountains.

This is all going to happen in a couple of weeks. So exciting!
deird1: Vimes lighting a cigar using a swamp dragon, with text "Fabricati Diem Pvnc" (Vimes)
Having had quite a few people subscribe to me lately, I need to let you know something that most of my olds will be aware of.

That is:

1) I live in Melbourne, Australia.

2) I have a couch you can crash on, and a dinner invite to any of you who are willing to fly this far.

Just so you know.
deird1: Twilight Sparkle's hot air balloon (MLP:FiM hot air balloon)
Currently stuck in bed fighting off a virus, so I thought I'd pass the time by telling you all about Australian Christmas.

Christmas in Australia is like Christmas in Britain, but hot. The end.

okay, there's more to it than that )
deird1: Gunn in a suit, holding a shotgun, with text "Charles Gunn: attorney at law" (Gunn with gun)
Aaaand here goes the government being stupid again. Honestly, our politicians change their leadership more often than they change their underwear.

My thoughts over the last few days:

Government says "We keep chasing Labor's [more left-wing] base, and losing people from our own [right-wing] base to One Nation!". Mez thinks "Well... I was pretty solidly in your base, and you lost me to the left wing. You're pretty much losing people from all sides."

Turnbull says "We need to stop focusing on politics! If we don't get back to thinking about important issues, Bill Shorten will win the next election!" Mez thinks "Isn't worrying that 'Shorten will win' pretty much the definition of focusing on politics?"

Dutton lobbies to be PM. Mez screams, and starts stocking up on canned goods.
deird1: a cross, on a rainbow flag (believe out loud)
(I have no wider point at the end of this. I'm just wanting to get it out of my head and into writing so I stop kicking things and growling.)

I have spent quite a while this week arguing with Jack about marriage equality.

Who is Jack? Jack is a collective noun – or a personification – representing the many and varied people on my Facebook friends page who are trying to convince Australia that marriage equality is a bad idea.

inside Jack's head )
deird1: Dawn drinking a milkshake (Dawn milkshake)
A piece of random Aussie etiquette for you:

(Context: I was reading a discussion of various cultural "gifting" things, and the Aussie cup of tea came up. Was the first time I'd really thought about it.)

If you go to someone's house, for any reason that requires you staying more than about a minute, you will be offered a cup of tea or coffee. (By which I mean, they'll say "Would you like a tea or coffee?" or offer one and instantly apologise for not having the other. Never just the one.)

When this happens, there are various options at your disposal:
1) "Yes, I'd love a cup of tea."
2) "Yes, I'd love a cup of coffee."
3) "No, thank you."
4) [the hidden one that foreigners don't know about]

Options 1 and 2 are great. Option 3 will... be a problem. Most likely, your Aussie host will look a bit puzzled, and ever-so-slightly frantic, and start offering up all the miscellaneous contents of their fridge until you pick something. This is because, as with many cultural issues, there's a whole lot of subtext happening.

See, you think the conversation has happened like this:
"Would you like a tea or coffee?"
"No, thank you."


Whereas, it's actually done this:
"I am happy to be your host. Are you happy?"
"No. I am not happy. Host better."


(It's much the same as the standard "How are you?" "Good! How are you?" "Good!" exchange. Very few people are actually asking. They're just checking that you're willing to be pleasant in their direction.)

The subtextual conversation we're aiming for is:
"I am happy to be your host. Are you happy?"
"Yes, I am happy to be your guest. You're being a good host."


This will be best achieved by the aforementioned options 1 or 2, or by secret option 4. Which goes like this:
*friendly sigh* "I'd love a glass of water!"


...then, you say thanks for the water, and if you're not thirsty, you don't actually need to drink it.
deird1: Dawn, with text "troublemaker" (Dawn troublemaker)
Well, I've spent the last two days frantically reading news sites and Reddit-Australia, and I still have more election flailing to do, so I'm going to tell you all about it...



Firstly, for the Aussies:
you guys KNOW )


And for everyone else:
an explanation )

...and that's where we're at.
deird1: Anya looking stern (Anya glasses)
The Context
A kid was killed by an alligator at Disney World. The pond he was wading in had a sign saying "no swimming".

The Argument
The parents were at fault because
a) It's Florida, alligators are everywhere, and everyone should know this.
b) There was a "no swimming" sign, which should have clued them in that alligators were likely to be in the area.

The Rebuttal
a) I am Australian. I live in a very dangerous region of the world, where we don't put on gumboots without checking for spiders. We expect to find snakes, dingoes, sharks, and crocodiles in most outdoor settings.
I would not have expected there to be alligators in this pond.
Yes, I'm aware that Florida has alligators, but Queensland has crocodiles, and I still expect hotels to be crocodile-free. Crocodiles can't generally get over fences. Alligators can. I didn't know this.

b) If I see a sign that says "Danger: Crocodiles! No swimming!", I expect there to be crocodiles around, and that I shouldn't go swimming. If I see a sign that simply says "no swimming", sans explanation or exclamation marks, I assume it's roughly equivalent to "keep off the grass" - ie: the maintenance crew are trying to stop you from trashing the area. I certainly wouldn't expect wading to be dangerous.



People who keep making this argument? You kinda suck.
deird1: Twilight Sparkle's hot air balloon (MLP:FiM hot air balloon)
I have been reading a lot about the US election lately, and have come to a simple conclusion: our elections are better.

I've also realised that I've never told you all about our elections, so for anyone who's curious, keep reading...


Australian Elections and Why They're So Much Better Than Yours (Whoever You Are)

1) We have an independent group organising them.

This being the Australian Electoral Commission. They organise the whole shebang, and oversee the voting. Among other things, this greatly limits gerrymandering, as the electoral districts are figured out by people who are required by law to be impartial.


2) The campaign season doesn't go on for an eternity.

Most likely, our election this year will be held on July 2nd. We're still not sure, though, because it hasn't been announced yet.

You guys have campaigns that go on for MULTIPLE YEARS. It's INSANE.

Plus - we have no primaries. So we're not all sick of the candidates before we even reach the main event.


3) Voting is on Saturdays.

This makes it easier for everyone to attend, rather than getting stuck at work. It's also a lot more relaxing. (If you go to the right polling booth, you can have a democracy sausage afterwards. They are yummy and awesome.)


4) Voting is compulsory.

Everyone votes. EVERYONE. Which, among other things, means that you don't get candidates trying to "get out the vote" by being as radical as possible. Instead, aware that the vote will be "out" whether they like it or not, they have to cater to as many people as possible, by heading more for the centre.


5) We have preferential voting.

...and this is the best bit. The uber-reason why Australia's elections rock and everyone else's are just second best.

Our ballots are a bit more complicated than yours. We don't choose a single candidate - instead, we rank all the candidates, from best to worst.

Why is this awesome? Because there ain't no such thing as "throwing your vote away" on a third party candidate.

I can vote for Awesome McPolicyGuru, who probably won't win, in the comforting knowledge that, when they fail to win as per usual, my vote will instead go to Nice von-Competent rather than Evil Villainson. And, if enough people do the same, Awesome McPolicyGuru could even get elected! Woo!

This is why our government is less of a two-parties-and-nothing-else situation that the US. The way your elections are set up, you're pretty much always going to have two viable candidates and no-one else - whereas we usually have a decent showing of third party and independent MPs. Because we can actually elect them.
deird1: Aeryn holding a baby and shooting a gun, with text "working mother" (Aeryn working mother and baby)
In Australia, the gyno will happily take care of all your prenatal and delivery needs. Except for any blood tests or ultrasounds. For those, you'll have to go off site.

In Germany, your blood tests and ultrasounds will all be done right at the gyno's office.
...attend your delivery? Why on earth would he do that?



In Germany, you remove all clothing from the lower half of your body, walk across the room, hoick yourself up into the stirrups, and wait for large, cold objects to be shoved into you.

In Australia, you are given a hospital gown, and then the ultrasound technician, very discreetly, says "I'll just give you some privacy to change." After which, presumably, she comes back into the room and sticks large, cold objects into all the body parts she's carefully not noticing yet.
...at least, I assume so, if I hadn't snorted, told her about Germany, and stripped off right in front of her.



(Yep. You are correct in your wonderings.)
deird1: Darla looking pretty (Darla pretty)
After three ridiculously hot days, the storm has finally broken. We have every window in the house open, and I am sitting here in the cool, refreshing air, listening to the lovely sound of Aussie rain.

It sounds different here. Rain, I mean.

You see, we have this thing called corrugated iron, which makes up a rather large percentage of the roofs in this country. If you're standing anywhere near any kind of building, you are standing somewhere where you will hear rain falling on corrugation, every time it rains. It's a lovely sound. And not one I got to hear last year.

Tourism websites might talk up the landscapes and the marsupials, but my vote for Best Part of Australia is the sound of the storms.
deird1: Faith and Wesley, with text "rogue demon hunters" (Faith Wesley rogue demon hunters)
Being slightly homesick, have spent half an hour on YouTube watching Americans eating vegemite.

GUYS. IT'S NO WONDER YOU HATE IT. YOU'RE EATING IT WRONG.


Everyone keeps grabbing a spoon, scooping up a big glob of vegemite, and sticking it straight in their mouth. Then gagging and saying they hate it. I'm not surprised. I'd hate it too.

Vegemite is extremely potent stuff. It's supposed to be used to add a hint of flavour to your food, not be eaten as an OVERWHELMING FORCE the way all the YouTube people are doing it. Honestly, you're basically putting a full heaped tablespoon of salt in your mouth, and then complaining about everything tasting salty!

...which is a pretty good analogy, because vegemite is quite salty, and works in a similar way to salt.


To properly eat vegemite:
1) Make a piece of toast.
2) Add copious amounts of butter to the toast.
3) Get a very very small amount of vegemite, scrape it over the toast, and then scrape any and all excess off. You should be left with a light-brownish layer of vegemite, through which you can still see the butter.
4) Now eat it.

Quite simple, really.

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deird1: Fred looking pretty and thoughful (Default)
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