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deird1At about 2 o'clock this afternoon, drowning in punctuation, right before my brain melted and started draining out my ears, it occured to me:
What I really need is two jobs.
For the first I've got editing (with the aforementioned punctuation swarms and brain liquidising), but to balance it out I really need to find another job that is about as opposite as I can get.
Like...
KICK-BOXING.
NINJA KICK-BOXING.
NINJA LION-TAMER KICK-BOXING, WITH FLAME BREATH AND GRENADE GLOVES.
AND I CAN BE IN A SECRET SOCIETY WITH ALL THE OTHER NINJA KICK-BOXING LION TAMERS, AND WE CAN ALL SWAP GRENADE GLOVE RECIPES. BUT WE'LL HAVE TO TALK IN A CODE ENTIRELY MADE UP OF GROANING, BECAUSE IN OUR DAY JOBS WE'LL BE EDITORS AND TEACHERS AND THINGS, SO BY THE TIME IT GETS TO MIDNIGHT AND WE CAN ASSEMBLE FOR OUR SECRET MEETINGS OUR BRAINS WILL HAVE MELTED OUT OUR EARS AND SLOSHED OFF TO HIDE. BUT IT WON'T MATTER IF OUR GROANS DON'T MAKE SENSE, BECAUSE NONE OF US WILL BE LISTENING ANYWAY. WE'LL BE WAY TOO BUSY AIMING NINJA KICKS AT LIONS.
It's the perfect solution, really.
What I really need is two jobs.
For the first I've got editing (with the aforementioned punctuation swarms and brain liquidising), but to balance it out I really need to find another job that is about as opposite as I can get.
Like...
KICK-BOXING.
NINJA KICK-BOXING.
NINJA LION-TAMER KICK-BOXING, WITH FLAME BREATH AND GRENADE GLOVES.
AND I CAN BE IN A SECRET SOCIETY WITH ALL THE OTHER NINJA KICK-BOXING LION TAMERS, AND WE CAN ALL SWAP GRENADE GLOVE RECIPES. BUT WE'LL HAVE TO TALK IN A CODE ENTIRELY MADE UP OF GROANING, BECAUSE IN OUR DAY JOBS WE'LL BE EDITORS AND TEACHERS AND THINGS, SO BY THE TIME IT GETS TO MIDNIGHT AND WE CAN ASSEMBLE FOR OUR SECRET MEETINGS OUR BRAINS WILL HAVE MELTED OUT OUR EARS AND SLOSHED OFF TO HIDE. BUT IT WON'T MATTER IF OUR GROANS DON'T MAKE SENSE, BECAUSE NONE OF US WILL BE LISTENING ANYWAY. WE'LL BE WAY TOO BUSY AIMING NINJA KICKS AT LIONS.
It's the perfect solution, really.