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a Grand Unified Theory of Shipping
My sister and I spent a few years discussing this. Thought I'd write it down for anyone who's interested.
You see, we noticed that people tend to end up shipping the same types of relationships. People who ship Joey/Pacey also tend to ship Han/Leia, and House/Cuddy, and Ron/Hermione (or so was our theory).
And, because my sister and I are both nerdy people with too much time on our hands, we decided to figure out how different ships could be classified, so that we could figure out, definitively, which types of ships were "the same type".
A Grand Unified Theory of Shipping
Imagine that you have a graph with two axes. The first axis is Emotional Intensity – going from "Completely Laid Back" to "Totally Emotional". (Note: this is the outward emotions. How emotionally they interact with each other.) The second is Directness – going from "Upfront and Confrontational" to "Could Not Possibly Talk About This Even At Gunpoint".
Any single relationship can have high intensity emotions or a fairly laid back vibe. And any relationship can be direct and upfront about the emotions that exist, or try to completely avoid talking about the emotions at all.
This naturally leads to four different kinds of relationship.
Soul Mates: High Emotions, Direct and Upfront
Buffy/Angel, for instance. Lots of passionate declarations, sobbing when apart, clutching each other dramatically when together... the whole thing. Not always quite as epic as I'm describing - but always with both parties very clear that they care about each other and they're wanting to let each other know.
(see also: Willow/Tara, Joey/Dawson, House/Cameron)
Best Friends: Low Intensity, Direct and Upfront
Friendships that blossom naturally into romance. These people tend to be quite into each other, but in a quieter, more comfortable way.
Harry/Hermione would fall into this category. So would Willow/Oz, Buffy/Xander, Parker/Hardison, and Simon/Kaylee.
Snarkers: High Emotions, Indirect and Avoidant
Snarky relationships tend to be very emotional - but they couldn't possibly talk about the emotions. That would be crazy! Instead, they talk around the emotions, usually by snarking at each other.
These relationships are often fun for writers, so they tend to come up a lot in tv shows. For instance: Buffy/Spike, Joey/Pacey, Xander/Cordelia, Mal/Inara, House/Cuddy, Ron/Hermione, Wes/Lilah, and Han/Leia.
Pragmatists: Low Intensity, Indirect and Avoidant
This is, for me, the most interesting type. Pragmatists usually care about each other, but talk about the relationship (if they talk at all) in a very matter-of-fact fashion, as if it's not actually all that important to them. And it is important to them, no question, but you don't say that! Definitely not. Much better to come across as completely chill and okay, just so you don't have to actually discuss those pesky emotions.
Willow/Kennedy (at least the way I ship them) are like this. So are Harry/Ginny, Chiana/D'Argo, and Nate/Sophie.
There are, of course, those ships that don't neatly slot into a category. Take Crichton/Aeryn: he's very direct and she's very avoidant, so their relationship tends to oscillate between Soul Mates and Snarkers depending on the day.
So, who ships what type of ship? I think it depends on what you find most important (unsurprisingly). I'm sometimes into high emotional intensity and sometimes the reverse, depending on the day – but I'm always more interested in people who avoid talking about their relationship at all costs. So pretty much every ship I've ever been into is Snarkers or Pragmatists.
Questions? Comments?
You see, we noticed that people tend to end up shipping the same types of relationships. People who ship Joey/Pacey also tend to ship Han/Leia, and House/Cuddy, and Ron/Hermione (or so was our theory).
And, because my sister and I are both nerdy people with too much time on our hands, we decided to figure out how different ships could be classified, so that we could figure out, definitively, which types of ships were "the same type".
A Grand Unified Theory of Shipping
Imagine that you have a graph with two axes. The first axis is Emotional Intensity – going from "Completely Laid Back" to "Totally Emotional". (Note: this is the outward emotions. How emotionally they interact with each other.) The second is Directness – going from "Upfront and Confrontational" to "Could Not Possibly Talk About This Even At Gunpoint".
Any single relationship can have high intensity emotions or a fairly laid back vibe. And any relationship can be direct and upfront about the emotions that exist, or try to completely avoid talking about the emotions at all.
This naturally leads to four different kinds of relationship.
Soul Mates: High Emotions, Direct and Upfront
Buffy/Angel, for instance. Lots of passionate declarations, sobbing when apart, clutching each other dramatically when together... the whole thing. Not always quite as epic as I'm describing - but always with both parties very clear that they care about each other and they're wanting to let each other know.
(see also: Willow/Tara, Joey/Dawson, House/Cameron)
Best Friends: Low Intensity, Direct and Upfront
Friendships that blossom naturally into romance. These people tend to be quite into each other, but in a quieter, more comfortable way.
Harry/Hermione would fall into this category. So would Willow/Oz, Buffy/Xander, Parker/Hardison, and Simon/Kaylee.
Snarkers: High Emotions, Indirect and Avoidant
Snarky relationships tend to be very emotional - but they couldn't possibly talk about the emotions. That would be crazy! Instead, they talk around the emotions, usually by snarking at each other.
These relationships are often fun for writers, so they tend to come up a lot in tv shows. For instance: Buffy/Spike, Joey/Pacey, Xander/Cordelia, Mal/Inara, House/Cuddy, Ron/Hermione, Wes/Lilah, and Han/Leia.
Pragmatists: Low Intensity, Indirect and Avoidant
This is, for me, the most interesting type. Pragmatists usually care about each other, but talk about the relationship (if they talk at all) in a very matter-of-fact fashion, as if it's not actually all that important to them. And it is important to them, no question, but you don't say that! Definitely not. Much better to come across as completely chill and okay, just so you don't have to actually discuss those pesky emotions.
Willow/Kennedy (at least the way I ship them) are like this. So are Harry/Ginny, Chiana/D'Argo, and Nate/Sophie.
There are, of course, those ships that don't neatly slot into a category. Take Crichton/Aeryn: he's very direct and she's very avoidant, so their relationship tends to oscillate between Soul Mates and Snarkers depending on the day.
So, who ships what type of ship? I think it depends on what you find most important (unsurprisingly). I'm sometimes into high emotional intensity and sometimes the reverse, depending on the day – but I'm always more interested in people who avoid talking about their relationship at all costs. So pretty much every ship I've ever been into is Snarkers or Pragmatists.
Questions? Comments?