Yesterday, BBC News Magazine published an article about the growing outcry against Michael and Debi Pearl’s book “To Train Up a Child.” I spoke at length with the reporter doing the research for this article and think he did an amazing and thorough job. Today, I was contacted by the BBC World Service and asked to join a radio program where I would, once again, confront Michael Pearl. You can listen to my exchange with Michael Pearl here (our segment begins at 27:40). Yes, I get fiery and passionate. At one point, I almost started crying because children have died! Michael Pearl can dismiss me, say I’m not providing context and say my experience isn’t normative but I will NOT stop speaking out! I know what his book teaches. I know how it is implemented. And I will keep speaking out until there are #NoMoreDeadKids.
The Doubleclicks have written a song about something every older sibling whose family celebrates a big gift giving holiday has gone through at one point. Youngest siblings and only children, you might want to sit this one out. This is for the big kids.
Well, dressed as ninjas. Can you imagine flagging down an actual ninja to bring your your check? Kotaku has more information on the Toyko eatery.
- Horror flick Oculus has a release date: April 18, 2014. To refresh your memory, this is the one starring Katee Sackhoff and Karen Gillan. We’re pretty excited. (Deadline)
- An piece in today’s Variety on the absence of female directors during this year’s awards season has a lot of great quotes the difficulty women in Hollywood face at all times of the year. My favorite is this one from critic Manohla Dargis: “The great irony is that women are accused of making romantic comedies, as if it’s a bad thing, but Marc Webb makes a romantic comedy and he gets Spider-Man. Are you kidding me? You cannot win.”
New editions of the Harry Potter will have brand new, full-color illustrations by Jim Kay. Here’s his Hogwarts. It’s on trees! Visit Nerd Approved to see the new Harry.
- We told you earlier today that NBC is producing more live musicals following the rating success of The Sound of Music. Now Andrew Lloyd Webber is saying Cats and Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat are getting (not made-for-TV, unrelated to NBC) movies as well. You get a movie musical! And you get a movie musical! Everybody gets a movie musicalllll! (/Film, The Guardian)
- Potential good news for fans of the recently cancelled Ripper Street: An Amazon-owned VOD company called LoveFilm is reportedly considering funding a third season, with the plan that episodes would premiere on LoveFilM and air later on the BBC. (Variety)
About a year ago Disney acquired Lucasfilm and stomped on the anthill that is the nerd world, sending us scrambling to figure out where we were in a world where Star Wars sequels could be made with minimal influence from George Lucas, and where one company owned the Disney Princesses, Pixar, the Muppets, Star Wars, and the film rights for the lion’s share of Marvel superhero characters. In comparison the Disney/Marvel acquisition seemed perfectly normal: Warner Bros. has owned DC Comics for years now, after all.
Disney’s chief financial officer told reporters at a conference yesterday that Disney isn’t necessarily done acquiring franchise properties, though they don’t have any in mind at the moment. They’re just, you know, leaving room in case they want dessert.
If you’ll forgive me for continuing the metaphor, Disney did have a bit of a snack this weekend when it worked out a deal with Paramount Pictures, who still hold the distribution rights for the Indiana Jones franchise. The end result of that was that Disney can now, if it so chooses, continue the franchise, reboot it, craft prequels, or whatever. And if the company does acquire more of the franchises you grew up loving, according to Jay Rasulo, the deals will be more of that size. From The Wrap:
“It’s safe to say you’ll continue to see us doing acquisitions in the future,” Rasulo told the Wall Street heavy crowd, advising them to not read too much into the buyback plans. He did say, however, that any deals would probably be smaller in size, noting that the company did not have “anything on the scale of LucasFilm or Marvel” in its sights.
As for how Indy and Star Wars will be integrated in with the rest of Disney’s holdings, Rasulo said we can look to Marvel for an example. So, I guess we’re getting an Indiana Jones team up movie? That’s a bit of a vague answer, but Disney is gearing itself up to have a Star Wars movie out every year, with a new trilogy supported by one-off movies. That’s not too dissimilar to Marvel, if you consider the Avengers films to be the trilogy and Thor, Captain America, and Iron Man to be the one-offs. It’ll be interesting to see how Indiana Jones, a much less robust (though no less compelling) setting for expanded universe stories, fits into this model.
(via The Wrap.)
I came across a post this morning that gave me pause. This particular article, appearing over at Experimental Theology and written by psychology professor Richard Beck, proposes a reimagining of the male gaze as actually a form of female power. Because men are visually stimulated, Beck proposes, and because this stimulation extends out of our evolutionary development in looking for mates, we need to be aware of the history of our bodies when examining incarnational theology. An incarnational theology must necessarily be an evolutionary theology, he proposes.
This baptism of the concept of the male gaze isn’t necessarily anything new – I’ve seen this argument many times throughout feminist theory. Men can’t help but look at and be stimulated sexually by women, and therefore we need to account for this when we discuss bodies and embodiment theology. Usually, “men are visual” is used as an argument for restricting what women wear in terms of modesty. Luckily, this author avoids this pitfall by instead arguing that clothing, within incarnational thinking, must be contextualized to the situation. But we must still acknowledge that understanding our biological imperatives can drive our choices, particularly when it comes to clothing and how we present ourselves (in this case, high heels).
While I am always in favor of a more incarnational theology, I feel that this reading of the issue relies far too heavily on a biologically determinist lens – which lends itself easily to a gender reductionist lens. Such an argument makes two major assumptions, which turn into a majorly flawed premise, and end up creating a theology that is only functions as incarnational for a select group of people.
The first mistake is that men, categorically, are more visual and that this is a result of evolution and reproduction. This is a branch of theology called evolutionary psychology, a branch often maligned (and deservedly so, in many ways, because of its lack of accountability for cultural factors). But this approach fails to account for cultural factors and the studies are thin on the ground – almost every study done on this issue has been on white, American or Western males, which fails to account for cultural divergences and variant sexualities. While gay men have shown this same tendency toward visual stimulation, to my knowledge, no studies on lesbian women or trans* individuals exist, necessarily limiting the extent to which we can apply the science.
The second mistake, hinted at in my previous sentence, is that men and women exist as binary categories. This error of category erases the existence of people who do not fit into the gender binary, and ignores the varying intersections of sexuality and gender as they exist today. In short, the evolutionary reading of the differences between men and women fails to account for modern gender theory and therefore falls short.
Combined, these two errors in assumptions function to create a premise for incarnational theology that is inherently and irretrievably flawed. The problem with the male gaze is not power (at least not wholly) but in the reduction of one’s gender and one’s existence to merely their bodies. Beck insists on a reading of attraction that reduces us to binarist, heterosexual bodies. The problem of the male gaze is not about attraction – it is about the insistence that a female body exists for the whims of the male one. That is the male gaze, not “gee honey, you look good tonight,” which seems to be the wider view that Beck is taking when he makes the gaze about the evolution of attraction.
The thing about incarnational theology is not that our bodies are determined by our evolution, but that our bodies matter insofar as they are a major part of our lived experiences. An incarnational theology that generalizes about the differences in our bodies and functions on a binary view of gender will necessarily be flawed and inapplicable to all – which creates a Gospel that is not Truth for everyone.
Theology surrounding embodiment is not merely about the cruciform Christ, fully human and fully God, but about our bodies as human beings, proposing that it is essential and basic to our theology that we exist as embodied human with our lived experiences influenced and changed by our physical presence. We are not "meatsuits" or biologically determined evolved beings, but unique, embodied, incarnated individuals for whom our bodily presence is just as important as the existence of our soul. Incarnational theology must account for all bodies – cisgender, trans*, intersex, and genderqueer together – as well as all sexualities – everything on the spectrum – if it is to reflect true embodiment.
Telling Porkies , Dawn/Mr.Gordo by beer_good_foamy.
A Minor Skirmish , Giles/Anya/Xander by gilescandy.
Syzygy, Spike/Xander by forsaken2003.
Fistfuls of Sand , Willow/Angel by velvetwhip.
The Gift That Keeps On Giving, Spike/Xander by joidianne4eva
Chapter Thirty Six of Think Of Me As Your Family by velvetwhip.
comlodge talks about her love for Spike .
Buffy icons by debris4spike.
Buffyverse icons by sietepecados.
Buffyverse icons by wickdshy.
mrmonkeybottoms recaps "Nightmares" .
"Some Assembly Required" screencaps , courtesy of effulgent_girl.
And Supernatural, Legend of Zelda, Star Trek and more besides. Heart Felt Design on Etsy has something for all the nerds on your list.
(via Geeks are Sexy.)
Mostly I talk about faith on this blog, but sometimes I like to post humor or life observations. Because life is funny, you guys.
Dear gentlemen of online dating websites, a few things:
1. Please use your own picture. Photos of your nieces/nephews/cousins in lieu of yourself is kind of creepy.
2. I like dogs (canines, not jerks), but I’m assuming you are a human and probably not a dog. A picture of you is nice. Pictures of you and your dog = bonus.
3. If one of your profile pictures is of your gun (actual firearm), no.
4. An ironic duck face picture can say something about your playfulness and sense of humor. Multiple pictures of only duck face says a lot about a lot else.
5. “Hey,” “‘Sup?”, pokes, winks, nudges, smiles, etc., aren’t conversation.
6. If you send me a message, please have some information about yourself on your profile.
7. To the occasional ladies that contact me, I’m pretty sure you’re robots. I’m not a robosexual.
8. I like coffee, conversation, and kind gentlemen. Go for it.
Single readers, what advice would you give to the people you’re looking to date?
That would be the Terminator reboot movie, not the Terminator reboot TV show. Though the two are related. Maybe someone else will play John Connor from a different timeline in the TV show? I can feel the time travel wrapping around my brain.
Deadline is reporting that Jason Clarke is “in early talks” to play John Connor in the Terminator film reboot, rumored to be called Terminator: Genesis. Clarke broke through in Zero Dark Thirty, where his acting really stood out in an ensemble cast of approximately five hundred thousand. (Seriously, famous people kept popping out of the woodwork. John Barrowman was there.) Since then he’s landed major roles in The Great Gatsby and the upcoming Dawn of the Planet of the Apes. Guy’s a good actor, and he’d be a welcome addition to the Terminator franchise. That’s not what’s weird.
What’s weird is that all the actresses we’ve heard bandied around as possibilities to play Sarah Connor—Emilia Clarke, Brie Larson, Margot Robbie, Tatiana Maslany—are younger than Clarke. Way younger. And John is Sarah’s son. If memory serves (and it’s been a while since I’ve seen Terminator and T2, so it may very well not) the first time get even a hint of older-than-a-teenager John is in Terminator Salvation… which Sarah isn’t in.
So how do Sarah and an adult John end up in the same movie? Maybe there’s time travel involved. Maybe there’s a split narrative. After all, we’ve heard that the TV series “will follow a critical moment from the first Terminator film (1984) and, where the film’s story goes one way, the upcoming series will take the same moment in a completely different direction.” Might that mean either Sarah or an adult John will branch off into the TV show? It’s just a whole mess of ??!!!?!?!!.
Whatever the case, if this is the direction they’re going with the John Connor character we’re definitely looking at a major alteration from the original movie. I’m all for it. If you’re going to reboot something there’s no sense in not making changes (good ones, please). And the possibility of Emilia Clarke and Jason Clarke playing mother and son is just too good. It’s meant to be.
You might have noticed that we don’t really do a lot of perfume reviews on The Mary Sue. Or any. That’s our sister site Styleite‘s thing. But when we were offered the chance to review Eau My, George Takei‘s foray into perfumery, we couldn’t say no. Could you? So, after a quick primer from Styleite on how the heck you even review perfume in the first place, we went around the office with a sample and asked for opinions.
- “Notes of citrus… might be because I just ate that grapefruit, though. No, there really is citrus. Citrus and clove.”
- “Men’s soap, a really clean dude right after he’s gotten out of the shower. I just want to bury my face in this.”
- “Sweet aerosol.”
- “The first floor of Bloomingdale’s.”
- “It smells like something I should like, but don’t.”
- “Wintery men’s cologne.”
- “Grapefruit finish.” (Upon me asking “…finish?”: “It’s like the end of the smell. I know perfume words.”)
- “Has all the notes that you’d associate with a men’s perfume, but it’s still kind of… fruity.” (Note: That is meant literally. Any perceived pun is unintentional. JSYK.)
And finally, from Glen over at Geekosystem:
- “This should smell like George Takei. They should collect his sweat and put it in a bottle.”
Welcome to SHIELD episode 10, where it’s a mid-season two-parter with a holiday break in between. In other words, plot chickens come home to roost and everything wrong happens so the audience can sweat about it over New Years.
And you know it’s serious when there’s a “Previously, on Agents of SHIELD” intro. It kindly reminds us about when Raina, the Girl in the Flower Dress visited a mysterious guy in a prison to ask about “Stage Three” and “The Clairvoyant,” because I’d completely forgotten to remember that scene and I’m recapping the show.
The mission of the week is to find and recover Edison Poe, former Marine, tactics expert, and convicted murderer, who was busted out of prison by three guys with super strength and Centipede implants. Other early episode exposition: Ward starts to joke about their sex life as he spars with May, and is met with a hard shut down. Skye is still doing research into her parents, and wheedles for more access to help her narrow down which SHIELD agent of the era could have dropped her off at that orphanage. Instead of giving her access (because he wants to protectively keep her from the truth), Coulson says he asked May to look into things for her.
Going up against Centipede means they’ll need backup, and they are provided it, in the form of someone who knows all about it. Mike Peterson, who we find pushing a bulldozer across a football field like a very cinematically-shot boss (“Did I beat Captain America’s time?” “Not even close.” Is Steve really that strong?), is our first recurring POC of the week.
Coulson takes the lull before Peterson arrives to warn May that Skye might be coming after her about research, a bit of subterfuge that May is not happy to be participating in. Not because she thinks Skye should know the truth, more like because she’s exhausted by the thought of having to interact with her. Peterson sticks the landing of integrating with the SHIELD crew by coming out right away with an apology for being a power crazed jerk and kidnapping and kicking a bunch of their butts the last time he saw them. As he says to Coulson, he’s dropped the villain act. This is his second chance, and he knows he won’t get a third.
Everybody heads off to Cleveland, where they have tracked down the sister of one of the soldiers, caught on security footage, who broke Poe out of federal prison. On the way, Peterson visits Coulson, eager to be of help in the field, only to have Coulson tell him that he wants him in the lab for testing. Using his super strength taxes him, and Coulson wants his own techies to be as familiar with Peterson’s limits as those at SHIELD HQ. Now, we all know that we’re going to see Peterson kick some superbaddie butt this episode, so I think that the real point of this scene might be when he tells Fitz and Simmons that it wasn’t SHIELD that perfected his Centipede implant (which now no longer holds the risk of self immolation, nor does he need to be topped up with serum in order to use his powers), it was the technobullet that they developed for Ward to shoot him with. Both SSibs get adorably flustered at his compliments.
On the way to talk to the soldier’s sister, Coulson notices Ward is reading some kind of eBook on the psychology of women, because I guess it’s implied that he wants to understand May better? Ward, babycakes. Even you should be able to tell that May is kind of atypical from the sort of generalizations made in books like that. Pick up The Psychology of Soldiers, for heaven’s sake. But despite how weird that is, I enjoy the rest of the scene for Coulson talking about his ‘cellist and how he had to basically leave her in the lurch when he died. She can’t know that he died fighting Loki, because that’s classified, and he can’t tell her he’s still alive, because that’s classified, so from her perspective he basically just stopped calling her. “Know where she is now?” Ward asks. “Course I do,” Coulson replies.
Then Coulson throws shade all over inter-agency dating, but it’s okay, Ward, because you’re not dating May. You’re just banging. Which is perfectly healthy, so long as that’s what you both want. Using a ruse and a
magical high-tech business card Ward and Coulson manage to get the soldier’s sister to call him and to trace the call to California.
Meanwhile on the bus, Skye finds prison footage of Raina visiting Poe to ask about the Clairvoyant, and Mike recognizes her as the lady who brought him to Centipede. Coulson maintains his hard line that the Clairvoyant couldn’t be a psychic because there’s no evidence that ESP is anything other than a myth. At this point I’m wondering if all this skepticism about psychics and telekinetics really lampshade hanging, or ominous foreshadowing. Meanwhile in a room full of shipping containers, Raina and Poe decide to set a trap for the team.
Mike and Skye share a nested “I’m a parent who can’t be with his child” and “I’m a child who can’t be with my parent” moment (Peterson’s son Ace is still staying with his sister) before everybody suits up to go take out this latest Centipede base. And of course, contrary to Coulson’s indications earlier in the episode, Peterson is along as well, in a brand new suit the SSibs made for him that monitors his vital signs so they can tell when he’s going to be overtaxed.
As foreshadowed, Centipede is ready for them. The three soldiers ambush Coulson, Ward, May, and Peterson and everybody fights. Three to one, Peterson gets injured, but manages to take one of the soldiers down before the rest are ordered to escape. Upon being questioned, the last soldier is killed by brain explosion just like in “Eye Spy.” In the dead man’s eye-feed, Raina recognizes Mike Peterson, and is interested what he has, unlike her soldiers, that lets him keep his super strength without repeated injections. “What he has is your key to Stage 3,” says Poe as the camera shows us a shot of Peterson (and Coulson, but we’re not supposed to think that that’s significant, yet).
Fitz and Simmons confirm that the dead guys’ explodey eye was the same as Amadour’s. Peterson asks who Amadour is and they answer “A one episode guest stint for an actor of color. We helped her, then she disappeared for a while.” “Kind of a pattern with you guys,” he says.
Just kidding, they actually say “Former SHIELD agent. We helped her,” and he says ”Kind of a pattern with you guys.”
Unlike Amadour’s eyeball, this new one is untraceable, so they can’t track down Centipede using it. Coulson is alarmed by how fast Centipede appears to be making technological advancements, which reflects either lots and lots of manpower or very deep pockets or both. And now, some character development.
Poe finally talks to the Clairvoyant for Raina, but says he can’t reveal what he was told yet, and that if she asks too many questions about the Clairvoyant he’ll have to carve out her eyes with a steak knife. He did tell the Clairvoyant that she’s been doing a good job though, and she’s creepy!touched and kind of comes on to him. Actually you could just prefix everything Raina does with creepy! and it would be true. She’s got a very subtle evil about her that I like. May gets pissed at Ward for taking a punch for her in the fight, because A) she doesn’t need it and B) it might betray their relationship, and he gets all IT WAS TACTICAL I DON’T HAVE FEELINGS I NEVER HAVE FEELINGS, rounding it out with a “don’t flatter yourself” like the dumb jerk he is. May’s not the one reading psychology textbooks, Ward. It turns out Skye accidentally overheard at least part of the conversation, which frazzles privacy freak May into telling her that Coulson is not actually helping to research her parents because he doesn’t want her to know the truth. The truth, according to May, is that she needs to figure out whether she’s in SHIELD for the mission, or for herself. Which, okay, super mean to break her faith in her SHIELD dad, but yeah, that’s still been Skye’s problem from day one.
Skye responds to this by tearing up her printouts of possible SHIELD moms and hiding in her bunk. Coulson almost goes in to talk to her, but retreats when he hears her crying. There is sad guitar music. Peterson visits Coulson in his cabin, and it is revealed that he hasn’t seen his son since SHIELD picked him up because he can’t face him after being such a monster in the first episode. Coulson gives him a “you should think harder about being a dad” talk, because being a SHIELD agent means you can’t prioritize him. He says he’s seen “first hand” the kind of damage that can do to a kid, and my goodness, that could refer to anybody from Tony Stark to Skye.
Then Peterson calls his son and finds out that Raina has kidnapped him OHHH NOOOOOO. Thankfully, he tells the SHIELD team right away, so the last ten minutes aren’t the old trope of a character going to a secret hostage trade off instead of just asking for help. So, SHIELD can help out with a non-electronic tracking method that will let them keep tabs on Peterson until he’s recovered from the shipping container fight enough to bust out, and they head out to the trade point, but we were all warned that this was a two parter so of course something’s going to go wrong.
The first thing is that Ward, in his sniper’s perch, loses line of sight on Coulson, Peterson, and Raina as they go to make the swap due to a giant obvious cement truck, so, like, SHIELD agent scouting fail. Maybe next time pick a different building, Ward. Coulson and Raina begin sassy hostage negotiations, and Raina reveals that she’s not here to trade Ace for Peterson. Peterson’s betrayed them all to save his son. She’s here for Coulson.
Peterson grabs her by the throat, his last gambit, and threatens to kill her if she doesn’t let Ace and Coulson go. Raina simply replies that her employer doesn’t care whether she lives or dies, just that she gets Coulson. Still it takes Coulson to talk Peterson down with some advice about how he should be a good dad to Ace, because Coulson has so much dad experience not having kids or a family. I joke about Coulson being SHIELD dad and the team being a bunch of babies, but honestly a part of me was pretty skeptical of Coulson giving advice about how to be the father of a young child to a guy who is already the father of a young child. Not of every scene in which it happened, obviously Coulson’s got some personal experience to draw on about how SHIELD messes with interpersonal relationships, but some of the bits.
Anyway, Peterson lets Raina go and she turns over Ace. After he and Ace leave, she and her soldiers start to drag Coulson away, causing panic among the SHIELD team, who have no idea what’s going on. Peterson leaves Ace with Skye, and then runs back towards the Centipede folks to try and rescue Coulson with his superpowers because he wants to be a hero not a villain. Then that big truck that was blocking Ward’s line of sight blows up, with Peterson in the blast. So does the Centipede car. All the Centipede baddies themselves make off in a helicopter, shooting Ward in his sniper nest for good measure.
Stinger: Coulson tells Raina he won’t give her what she wants. She says all she wants is to hear about the day after he died.
So there you have it, folks, the first recurring POC character of the week and he dies in his second episode. Unless he hasn’t died because superpowers. And that’s not too implausible, in my book: having a dad blown up in front of his kid feels a bit dark for SHIELD.
What Centipede wants with Coulson is certainly the question that the show wants us to be focusing on during the holiday break. What is it about Coulson’s death that makes him the key to phase 3, instead of Peterson, who has somehow acquired a perfected form of the Centipede implant? Is it something that SHIELD did to him that we do not know about? Is phase 3 perhaps not even about perfecting the implants? Was it really Fitz-Simmons’ bullet that made Peterson’s implant non-fatal and self-sustaining? Or was it something SHIELD secretly did to him later at the Bridge?
Speaking of the episode’s title, it’s easy to see “The Bridge” as a reference to the episode’s last scene, it was also mentioned in last week’s ep. “The Bridge” was where Coulson said they were bringing Hannah the presumed telepath. So presumably the Bridge is where SHIELD receives new members of the Index, helps them cope with their new powers, and if, like Peterson, they so choose, integrates them with SHIELD. Integration with SHIELD was a theme throughout the episode with Peterson and Skye, who are both using SHIELD not for its own sake but as a way to get closer to their families, Skye by figuring out who they are, and Peterson by trying to become a hero for Ace.
There are a number of things to look forward to when the show returns in January, most obviously and intentionally, a reveal of more information (if not all the information) about Coulson’s death and resurrection. But there were other things in the episode and the sneak preview that I’m intrigued by. I hope that Peterson is not actually dead. I’m intrigued by glimpses of a harder, combat dressed, Skye. And I’m also interested by the various wrenches thrown into the team’s cohesiveness by this episode. If upon its return the show was about Coulson’s team pulling together to rescue him, it’d basically be the end of “0-8-4” on a grander scale, but serious steps were taken to make big rifts between second in command May, and Ward and Skye. There’s also some hints that SHIELD brass won’t feel the need to prioritize Coulson’s rescue, indicating that there will be some more wrinkles to the story than a simple rescue mission. See you in (nearly) a month!
I’m a sci-fi geek who has never seen Battlestar Galactica. Yes, I know, I know. 2013 is the year I change that, and I’m blogging as I go.
I. HATE. EVERYTHING.
*sobs onto keyboard*
A Disquiet Follows My Soul
The identity of the Final Cylon has been discovered. Humans and Cylons have begun a new quest to find a habitable home planet. There’s only half a season to go. I’m ready for things to kick into high gear, and instead this episode gives us a show going into statis. Sigh.
We start with Adama being full of ennui, and it’s such an innocuous scene—him waking up late, getting ready for work—that I was half convinced that when he coughed it meant he’d die of a sudden illness by the end of the episode. But no.
Over in sickbay Six and Tigh are doing the happy parent routine as Six gets her first sonogram. Sure, Tigh’s still grumpy, because it’s Tigh and he’s contractually obligated to be, but all the same he’s remarkably sappy by his standards. He’s holding Six’s hand. There’s some stuff about how this is the first time two Cylons have managed to reproduce, and there’s a nurse who’s constantly DNW-face-ing at Cylons being happy over their ~miracle baby~ and the ~future of their species~. But I can’t even focus on that, because Tigh/Six is still a thing. I don’t understand, and I don’t approve.
Gaeta, in the sick bay for some prosthetic leg maintenance, is ten thousand percent bitter about the easy acceptance the Cylons have gotten. We find in this episode that a lot of people have misgivings about the rumored permanent alliance between Cylons and humans. Adama holds a press conference where he proceeds to not answer any of the press’ questions, because “This is all military business, which means it’s none of yours. Adama OUT!” Dude. That’s not going to fly. The tension is exacerbated by the fact that Roslin’s gone into seclusion since Earth went bust. Zarek takes advantage of people’s freak-outage about the President’s disappearing act to swoop into the void and stir up anti-Cylon sentiments.
I don’t know what Adama expected to happen when he won’t even try to work with the civvies in Roslin’s absence. Lee does his best to be the voice of moderation at Quorum meetings, but there’s only so much one junior representative can do. Adama refuses to even throw the rest of the fleet a bone and let them in on the identity of the dreaded Final Cylon. “You don’t need to worry about her anymore,” he says. “She’s dead.” But as far as your everyday civvie is concerned this is the monster under the bed, the boogeyman responsible for the destruction of humanity. Keeping absolutely everything to yourself is not an option.
The situation is kind of Inception-y, by which I mean the protagonists could easily be the bad guys of someone else’s story. Dom Cobb & co. are thieves. Adama and Roslin are… well, they’re pretty much dictators. Only we’re not supposed to believe they really are, because the only in-show character saying it is Zarek, and he’s a villain. I kind of wish the show would just own up and admit it.
The Cylon and human leaders are cooking up a plan to upgrade the fleet’s FTL drives with Cylon technology. It’ll triple the fleet’s jump capacity, meaning they’ll be able to search for far more potentially habitable planets before they run out of food and fuel. The Quorum, still suspicious of the Cylons, don’t want to allow Cylon tech on civvie ships. Lee suggests that to bring them around they promise that only humans will do the installations, which Tyrol points out is impossible. Gaeta, who’s been stinkfacing through this entire conversation, really lets a good one fly:
Mr. Distrustful of Cylons asks what the catch is, and it turns out there is one: The Cylons want full citizenship. That way if Cavil and his goons come along Adama will be bound by honor to protect them just like he would his fellow humans. Everyone’s immediately like “Uh, no,” but Adama appears to be considering it. Only he has to ask Roslin first.
Except Roslin’s not too keen on getting back into politics. We see her throwing away her pills, accepting that she’s going to die soon and deciding that she’d rather spend what time she has left doing things like yoga and jogging instead of going in for cancer treatments. According to Doc Cottle her subsequent good mood is temporary euphoria brought about by stopping treatment, but Roslin doesn’t care. When Adama asks her about the citizenship question she stalls him. I was the prophecized leader before, but that didn’t work out. Is there another role I have to play for the rest of my life? Well… yeah. You’re still the President. I feel for her, and her desire to walk away is completely understandable, but at the same time… you have responsibilities. If you’re going to go AWOL, at least pass on your duties to other people first, else you end up leaving Zarek the keys to the human race.
Zarek gives a speech to the Quorum and convinces everyone but Lee to vote in favor of barring any Cylon from boarding a civilian ship without the approval of its residents. As a result a bunch of ships start ignoring the Galactica’s orders, and one of them, the all-important tylium ship, straight-up leaves. Adama, after ordering Zarek’s arrest, proceeds to thoroughly pwn the sleazy politician, saying he’ll release records of Zarek’s corruption if he doesn’t give up the ship’s coordinates. He’s totally bluffing, but evidently Zarek is a corrupt SOB because he completely buys that Adama has a ton of info on his evil deeds. He capitulates, and the Galactica gets the tylium ship t0 come back.
… except Zarek’s not done poking his head in, because he’s Zarek. Earlier in the episode we saw Gaeta approach Starbuck in the mess and be a complete jerk to her, giving her crap about being married to a Cylon and maybe being one herself. Starbuck spices up the dull episode, as she is wont to do, by firing right back, calling Gaeta a “cripple” and a “gimp” and giving him flak for thinking anyone should care about his leg. Jesus frakking Christ, you two.
Unbeknownst to Starbuck, but knownst to us, she played right into Gaeta’s hands. The point of him confronting her way to get the attention of everyone else in the mess hall. After she storms out he proceeds to do some anti-Cylon preaching, presumably. At the end of the episode he officially joins forces with Zarek. Gaeta will be the one to perform some “small act of courage” intended start a revolution.
Gaeta, you bonehead. Do not hitch your wagon to Zarek’s star! You have Admiral Adama’s ear. He invites you to his super-important meetings! If you have concerns about the way the fleet is behaving, ask him about them. Or ask Lee! Or ask someone. Starting a violent revolution is not the way to go.
That said, this decision absolutely fits his character. I’ve written (at length, because I have feels) about how Gaeta lets emotion rule his decision-making. Even all the way back in the documentary episode we saw him all “I’m a cool dude with my unbuttoned jacket and my tat, eyyyyyyyy.” He wants to be a rebel. He wants to be a savior, a freedom fighter, something other than a secondary character in a show where he’s in direct opposition to the main characters. Damn this show’s consistent characterization.
Gaeta. My love. This will not end well for you.
The revolutionaries do have a point, by the way, even if they’re going about it the wrong way. It’s been, what, three years since the Cylons nuked the 12 colonies and attempted genocide against humanity? And they’ve been chasing them ever since. Cylons practically enslaved the fleet on New Caprica. The civilians have no reason to support putting the fate of humanity in the Cylons’ hands. Adama and Roslin have reasons. They know the situation with the rebels. They’ve been convinced that there are good Cylons. Wonderful. Now they need to convince everyone else (one speech from a Six doesn’t cut it). They’re supposed to be a representative government for Chrissakes! They don’t have the luxury of believing that people will—or should—accept all their policy decisions on face value, especially when what’s at stake is their lives and the lives of everyone they know. Roslin and Adama have earned the trust of humanity, but they still have to work to keep it. I don’t blame Roslin for her siesta, but she’s continually had a problem with not seeing herself as accountable to the people and the Quorum. And Adama’s not helping, what with holding press conferences where he won’t answer the questions and constantly engaging in dick measuring contests with Zarek. It’s a major failure of leadership, and I hope later episodes acknowledge that.
Tyrol has a plotline where he discovers Baby Nicky, who’s come down with acute renal failure and might lose a kidney, isn’t actually his kid. Turns out right before they got married Cally got horizontal with Hot Dog, who doesn’t even know he’s the father. Tyrol follows him to one of Baltar’s meetings and proceeds to wail on him. Tyrol, no. That’s like beating up the family puppy. Don’t do that. The two of them visit sickbay, and when Tyrol goes into fatherly advice mode I think maybe he’s stopped being such a jerk. But then:
Tyrol: Lesson one. If your kid’s in the hospital, never leave him alone. You have first shift.
Hot Dog: Sounds good. Wait, how long do I sit here?
Tyrol: Until I get back.
Tyrol: Which’ll be when I’m sober.
Tyrol: Frak you.
What was the point of all that? Seriously. Maybe to completely cut Tyrols’ ties from humanity by making the kid he thought he had with his wife not even his? But he was already pretty much there anyway. Popping in a random “You are NOT the father!” is just zzzzzzzz.
Speaking of zzzzzzz, I think Baltar is just as bored as I am. About halfway through the episode I was praying for his smarmy, narcissistic ass to make an appearance and mix things up. Then we got a scene where Baltar was giving a rousing sermon, but he was totally on autopilot (and maybe a bit drunk): “God made us all perfect, so everything we do is perfect. We didn’t do anything near bad enough to deserve our present fate, so maybe we should blame God, because what has he done for us lately? Yeah, you guys yell while I have a smoke.” Even Tyrol attacking Hot Dog doesn’t make him look like he’s not about ready to slip into a coma:
The episode ends with Roslin and and Adama doing a bit of (shirtless, woooo!) snuggling in bed. It’s cute that they’ve apparently turned into teenage hippies, but it’s not enough to make this episode any less dull. You can’t deliver a plot twist like the discovery of Earth and then sweve into “Meh, Whatever”ville. Bring back Ellen!
Gaeta you bonehead, you are going to get yourself killed.
The revolution subplot is starting to work for me, actually.
The episode starts fairly innocuously—Adama and Tigh are in the former’s quarters chatting about how even more ships have started disobeying direct orders. Roslin casually comes out of Adama’s bedroom wearing a robe, and I’m not sure, but I think Adama is turning a smug “Yeeeeah, guess who just got some?” look to his best friend. That’s what I’m rolling with anyway. Tigh suggests that maybe he shouldn’t be the one dealing with this whole kerfluffle, what with all the robot racism in the fleet. After he leaves Adam and Roslin have a chat in which Roslin insists she’s done with politics (might want to get a replacement in line, then. Just sayin.’) but then proceeds to offer advice on which Quorum member Lee will be most able to sway to his side.
Sure you’re out of politics, Roslin. Sure.
Meanwhile the plot to take over the Galactica is underway. Gaeta breaks Zarek out of the brig and gets him to the hangar bay, where Racetrack fakes a dangerous spill to get all the non-conspirators to leave. Racetrack, you’re in on this too? I suspect that the conspiracy will fail, if not this episode or the next then eventually. And I don’t want anything bad to happen to Racetrack. I really like her.
Oh, what am I saying? This is Battlestar Galactica.
Laird, the ex-civvie/ex-Pegasus deck chief/current Galactica deck chief senses that something foul is going on and insists that he check with the CIC before Zarek—whom Gaeta says Adama is spiriting away to prevent an assassination attempt—be allowed to leave the ship. Gaeta tries to put him off the scent, but it takes Zarek beaning him with a wrench to get him from blowing the whole plot. Zarek gives a big speech about revolution and no hesitation and he won’t be the last (wait, did Laird die?), and then he and Racetrack beat it to the Colonial One.
The entire thing is witnessed by the main hippie cult woman with the sick kid. I keep forgetting her name.
Gaeta goes to the CIC, where he proceeds to convince everyone that what looks like a ship making an unauthorized departure is just a DRADIS glitch. Computers, amirite? And everyone, even Tigh, buys it with zero hesitation, because even after Gaeta’s newly realized robo-racist tendencies they still can’t imagine that he’d be betraying them.
The next step is Gaeta saying there’s been a fire on Deck C, which happens to be where an arms locker is. Adama, thinking the fleet’s comms are at risk, orders that the deck be evacuated.
Part of Gaeta and Zarek’s plan is to round up all the Cylons on the Galactica. The first to get grabbed and put in Caprica’s cell is Anders. The next down are Athena, Hera, and—just for good measure—Helo. Making things even worse, among the kidnappers is one of the Pegasus crewmembers who almost raped Athena back in season two. He’s still bitter about Helo and Tyrol killing the Pegasus’ interrogator, and he plans to take it out on her.
Back on Deck C Starbuck hears the evacuation order and immediately realizes that’s something up. She sneaks around a bit and sees a bunch of civvies arming themselves. Obviously something major’s going down, so she calls the CIC to tell Adama about it. Only Gaeta, who mans the phone, hangs up on her.
I know you enjoyed that, bro.
Lee’s trying to calm the Quorum down when Zarek marches in all “honey, I’m home!” He knows that when the mutiny starts going down he can get 11 of the 12 representatives on his side, but he won’t be able to convince Lee. Instead he has to get him out of the way.
An opportunity presents itself when Lee tries to call his dad to ask why Zarek was released. He’s summarily dismissed by Gaeta, who says “Yeah, yeah, fine, I’ll tell him you called.” Zarek preys on Lee’s daddy issues by insinuating that Adama’s a threat to democracy, which is why he’s shutting his son out and making excuses not to talk to him. Again.
Fine, says Lee. I’ll go the Galactica and talk to him! I’ll prove you wrong, see if I don’t!
It turns out that getting Lee out of the way by sending him to the ship where the mutiny is taking place isn’t the best idea. As soon as he lands a marine tries to arrest him, but Starbuck pops out of the woodwork and shoots the marine in the head. She even has a zinger: “Take it from someone who died once. It’s no fun.”
So now Lee and Starbuck—who’s happier than she has been in ages now that she has a mission to accomplish and a reason to commit violence—are sneaking around the ship with guns. By this point Gaeta’s cut the Galactica’s comms, and while Adama and Tigh haven’t figured out the extent of what’s going on they’ve started to realize that something‘s not right. Hoshi unintentionally sells out his boyfriend when he notes that the gas reading from Deck C is normal, which means there’s no fire there. Adama orders Private Jaffe to go and lay eyes on the situation. When he comes back things start to go down.
The jig well and truly up, Gaeta plays his hand and reveals THIS IS A MUTINY, FRAKKERRRRS! The mutinous Marines get a bit trigger happy and Jaffe ends up dying, which sends Adama from mere nail-spitting anger to apopleptic rage with a side of “Gaeta, I will tear your spine out through your mouth.” Gaeta says that he’s removing Adama from command and arresting him for treason, since he’s betrayed his oath to humanity by letting his affection for a Cylon (meaning Tigh) cloud his judgement.
Are you accusing someone else of letting their emotions get in the way of their decision-making, Gaeta?
Are you really?
Adama goes into Batman Voice Mode and tells all the conspirators that if they go through with the mutiny they won’t be forgiven. Gaeta doesn’t back down; he orders that Adama and Tigh be taken to the brig and all the senior staff (including Hoshi! Feeeeels.) be locked in a holding cell.
Starbuck and Lee get to Adama’s quarters, where they find Roslin. They decide that Roslin has a shot at stopping Zarek from taking over if she can get a message to the fleet. Luckily, they know someone who has a pirate radio…
Tyrol is in charge over at Baltar’s hippie cult headquarters, making sure the place is barricaded and keeping everyone from panicking. Later Lee asks why he’s being so helpful, and he responds that Adama deserves a better fate than the one the mutineers will give him. There’s a secondary storage bay that they can use to get him off the ship, Tyrol explains. You just have to get him there.
It’s been decided that Baltar has to get off the Galactica too, since the mutineers are probably coming for him. Oh, of course you think the entire revolt is about you. He doesn’t seem that sad to be leaving his worshipful brethren; the main hippie lady tearfully gives him a statue, and after his awkward goodbyes he tells her “Um, no. You can keep it. Really. It’s fine.”
Do I smell the end of the hippie cult plotline? Do I smell Baltar actually getting to do things again?
Roslin busts in and demands that Baltar let her use his wireless, saying “There’s a chance we can avoid bloodshed if I address the fleet and assure them the Cylons mean no harm.”
They give each other a bit of flak about their respective religions, but in the end Roslin gets her broadcast. In the meantime Adama and Tigh manage to overpower two armed Marines, incapacitating one and taking the other hostage. Tigh leaps on one of them like a howler (growler?) monkey. It’s glorious.
It’s clear that not all of Gaeta’s mutineers are 100% comfortable with the plan now that it’s stared to go down—it’s less that they’ve found a new love of Cylons than they’re really uncomfortable with acting against Adama. Matters aren’t helped when Roslin’s speech goes out. It’s a good one, all about how allying with the Cylons was a difficult decision to make, but it’s the only option humanity has left.
Couldn’t have done that a week ago, huh? All right. Fine. Whatever.
Adams and Tigh run into Lee and Starbuck, and there’s a bit of dispute because Starbuck wants to shoot the hostage marine. ‘Buck, you know I love you, but right now is not the time to quibble over POW treatment. The end result is that they let the guy go, and the four of them make their way to the secondary storage bay.
Roslin and Baltar, already waiting there, exchange a bit of banter about Gaeta and how they’ve both bad luck when it comes to choosing Presidential aides. Baltar then calls the CIC and begs Gaeta to stand down. “I know you’re a good, honorable man,” he says, “Even your failings—like what happened with Eight on New Caprica—have been understandable. I forgive you for them. If you want redemption this isn’t the way to go about it.”
Lords of Kobol, that hurt! The call wasn’t some PR move on Baltar’s part, something to make him look good: The only other person in the room is Roslin, who already hates him, and he stepped away and spoke quietly so she wouldn’t hear him anyway. This is just Baltar trying to convince a former friend—someone who hates him, who stabbed him in the neck and lied in court in the hopes he’d get the death sentence—not to go down the dark path he’s set himself on. Baltar looks really upset when Gaeta hangs up on him. They were actually friends. Baltar still cares about Gaeta. I can’t handle this.
Gaeta notices that there’s a Raptor heading to the secondary storage bay, so he sends a group of Marines to cut the doors open and stop Roslin from leaving. Adama’s not going with her, because a Captain goes down with his ship and he won’t be able to live with himself if he leaves and all that. Plus he needs to stand guard and make sure Roslin’s Raptor gets away. After a makeout session that leaves Lee and Starbuck standing around awkwardly…
…the Raptor takes off with Roslin and Baltar onboard. Lee and Starbuck go do to whatever it is they’re going to do, leaving Adama and Tigh behind for a shootout with Gaeta’s Marines. It’s a suicide mission, and it might not even ensure Roslin’s safety, since the end of the episode shows Gaeta giving the order to fire on the fleeing Raptor.
I’m calling it: His underlings are going to refuse.
Marines throw a grenade into the secondary hangar bay, and if Tigh sacrificed himself by shielding Adama from the blow I will kill something.
Blood on the Scales
It is impossible to fully express my reaction to Gaeta’s death with a mere gif. I need a video:
As I predicted, not everyone is OK with Gaeta’s orders to shoot down President Roslin’s Raptor. Specifically, Hot Dog refuses to fire once Roslin gets through the comm jam and announces her identity. Hot Dog, my boy! Let me hug you. His fellow pilot Narcho has no such reservations. But Athena pulls some evasive maneuvers, and the Raptor lands safely on the Basestsar. There Roslin convinces the Cylons not to jump away by using the Final Four card: Adama’s still on the ship, so he could resolve the situation. Don’t give him the chance to do that and you’ll never see your precious fellow Cylons (minus Tory) again. She convinces them to move the Basestar into the middle of the fleet on the grounds that Gaeta doesn’t have the guts to shoot it when the civilian ships are right there.
Meanwhile Adama and Tigh are both alive, if a bit dinged up and captured by Gaeta’s Marines. Tigh’s been taken to the brig, where he and the other Cylons are fretting about what Gaeta plans to do to them. Adama gets marched to the CIC, where Gaeta tries to get him to convince Roslin to surrender. This is your ship now
, you frakking child, he responds. You want Roslin to do something? You can call her up and ask her yourself.
Zarek brings his smarm onto the Galactica, and through a chat with Gaeta we find out that they plan to try Adama for treason. Zarek doesn’t want to do it, but Gaeta insists that Adama answers for his myriad (perceived) evil actions, like leaving the fleet behind on New Caprica and allying with the Cylons.
Gaeta, I admire your dedication to due process. I really do, though I’d admire it more if you hadn’t shown your disrespect for it earlier by lying at Baltar’s trial. But Adama’s paid. He lost his ship. And it’s transparently obvious what’s going on here. I’ve called Gaeta a vindictive tool before, and that’s showing itself here. His insistence that Adama stand trial springs at least partially from the (illegal) trial that Gaeta was subjected to. He’s been put through some truly awful stuff—the trial, his leg—but unlike others, he cannot let it go. Like Hoshi said in the Gaetasode: A moral center. A strong, stubborn, occasionally wrong moral center.
Of course I come to the realization of similar Gaeta is to my favorite Game of Thrones character Stannis Baratheon in the episode where he dies, and therefore we won’t get to see any more of him. This show can go airlock itself.
In Adama’s quarters, now Gaeta’s, Zarek reads the charges to the ousted Admira: Treason, desertion, etc. etc. Adama, in true Old Man form, refuses to attempt to do anything that resembles placating the people who now have his life in their hands. They wanna shoot him? Fine. Whatever. He won’t give their trial any authority by taking part in it. And it’s not like it’s a fair trial anyway, ’cause Zarek’s the judge.
Unconvinced of the efficacy of Adama’s “You can go frak yourselves” defense is Romo Lampkin, who’s been called in to be Adama’s lawyer. He asks for a few minutes alone with his client, during which time he tries to convince Adama to at least defend his innocence for posterity. But Adama refuses–Gaeta and Zarek won’t be successful in his mutiny, which means he won’t need to convince future generations of anything, so there. Romo tries another tack, explaining that he should cooperate in order to give the people working to free him more chance to do so. But the Marines standing guard don’t much like that, and the meeting ends.
Meanwhile Zarek attends a meeting of the Quorum, which he’s relocated to the Galactica against Gaeta’s express wishes. Zarek gives a big speech about how great he and Gaeta are, but no one buys it, because no one wants them for their leaders.
Stop trying to make it happen, Zarek.
It’s not going to happen.
After they express their loyalty to Adama and Roslin, Zarek has them killed. All of them. The entire Quorum. Shot dead. Holy Jesus.
Gaeta, predictably, is all What the frak did you do?! I never agreed to this! But Zarek tells him to put his big boy pants on, buttercup, because this is what the coup is all about. What did you think was going to happen? For our next trick, we’ll kill Adama.
Poor Gaeta. He didn’t realize what a snake Zarek is the same way he didn’t realize what a snake Baltar is (was?). And now he’s in way too deep. If he and Zarek lose, he’s going to executed (*sob*). Even if he turns on Zarek and gives Adama back his ship, it’s probably too late for redemption. But if he and Zarek win he’s effectively handed the government over to a power-hungry murderer.
This whole time Tyrol’s been crawling around in the guts of the Galactica. He spends like 85% of this episode in tunnels for reasons we don’t know until the end, when it’s deus ex Tyrol. Anyway, there’s a scene here where he’s found by
Benny from Supernatural Kelly, who was arrested a few episodes back for trying to kill Romo. Kelly, being a Cylon hater, is firmly on Gaeta’s side… but he can’t seem to bring himself to shoot his old buddy. They have a bit of bro bonding, and Kelly lets him go.
Over on the Basestar Roslin is being flipping amazing. The Cylons decide that things are getting a little too hot for them and they’d rather leave the humans to their own devices. That doesn’t make Roslin angry. Or sad. Or desperate. Her response—I’m paraphrasing, but not that much—is “Wow, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize you were that stupid. Adama’s gonna kick Gaeta’s punk ass, and afterwards, if you’ve abandoned him, he is coming for your soul.”
While all this is going on Lee and Starbuck have been charging around the Galactica trying to find Adama. After a neat fake-out with an unarmed grenade the two of them get to the brig, and Lee is very upset that his dad’s not there. The entire group goes off to find him. There’s a nice moment where Starbuck stops to get weapons from some dead Marines and Anders immediately falls in behind her to do the same. They’re so similar, and Anders respects Starbuck’s judgement so much. Their romantic relationship didn’t work out, but they could still be such good friends.
Which, of course, is when Anders gets shot in the head.
Lee’s yelling at Starbuck that Anders won’t make it, which is probably accurate, because shot in the head. But Starbuck refuses to leave him, and the others continue on.
Now it’s time for Adama’s trial, which is basically him sitting in a room and getting yelled at for a few minutes before Zarek pronounces him guilty. Zarek gets a call that Tigh and everyone else in the brig are loose, but he turns it around and tells Adama that Tigh was killed trying to escape.
OOF. Bro feels!
I’m really sorry, Admiral, says Gaeta, but you did help Cylons. Like dear departed Tigh, for example, whom you let keep his job after you only found out what he was. Surprisingly, that tactic doesn’t make Adama any friendlier. To quote Supernatural, I’m pretty sure six seconds is too soon.
Right after Adama’s declared guilty a message from Roslin comes through on the PA, telling the fleet the Galactica’s been taken over by Gaeta, and shut down your FTL drives would you please? Turns out Leoben gave her some sort of technological whajahoozit that let her get through the comms block for a few seconds.
Starbuck’s dragging Anders through the halls when they come across Romo, who’s being escorted by a Marine. Said Marine is about to shoot Starbuck, which is bad for her because she’s out of ammo and can’t kill him first. So Romo takes him out with a pen to the neck.
Took out an armored, armed Marine.
With a pen.
And then he makes a point of taking his sunglasses from the Marine he just killed.
Let’s just take a moment to appreciate that.
OK. Starbuck asks Romo to help her get Anders to Doc Cottle, and at first he says no and leaves. But then his conscience pokes its head up, and he goes back to help.
And that’s the last we see of them this episode. What happened to Anders?!
Ten of the 35 ships have followed Roslin’s orders and turned off their FTL drives. Zarek, ever the optimist, says that’s great because now they know who’s not with them. They can take the good ships with them when they jump away and leave the bad ships to fend for themselves. Gaeta orders that Marines escort Adama to the main hangar deck to be executed.
Benny Kelly goes too, but he lags behind and starts crying. When Lee’s group comes across him he tells them where Adama is and asks he can can join up with them, which is pretty great, actually.
There’s something weird going on with Baltar on the Basestar, by the way. Well, I don’t know if it’s really weird or if just seems weird because all the Gaeta feels in this episode are messing with my head. Baltar’s been getting friendly with a Six who just seems… odd. She has long hair, first off, which none of the other Sixes do. Baltar seems to recognize her from somewhere. She’s just different. And then there’s the way Baltar dreams that Adama’s being executed. It could be a normal nightmare… or it could be a prophetic dream (albeit one of a future that doesn’t end up happening). After he wakes up Weird Six tries to distract him with sex, but he’s paralyzed by a wave of self-loathing because he ran away again. He didn’t escape the Galactica because he was scarred for his life. He escaped because he was sick of the hippie cult. He realizes that, though he’s dismissed them as Grade A idiots in the past, they’re his responsibility, and he has to go back for them.
Wow. That’s some character growth right there.
The cheese, as my grandfather always used to say, is getting binding. Adama’s about to be executed. Lee and the others are trying to get there in time to rescue him. Roslin sends a message to Gaeta saying he has five minutes to surrender. At this point I think he really wishes he could, because we see him in Adama’s office and IS THAT A FRAKKING TEAR?
IT’S A FRAKKING TEAR.
IF THERE WERE A STUFFED ANIMAL HERE I’D RIP ITS HEAD OFF.
He wants so badly to undo what he’s done, but he can’t. I thought for a split second he might surrender, but no. It’s gone too far now. He places the Admirals’ pins that Adama (scornfully) gave him earlier in the episode on Adama’s table, accepting that Adama’s the true leader and he’s not and he never could have been and he tried so hard and got so far, and in the end it doesn’t even matter, oh my frakking Gods, I can’t handle this! Ahem. Anyway. He makes the call to carry out the execution.
But it’s a moot point, because Lee & co. got there and stopped it in time. Adama tells Tigh that he thought he was dead, and Tigh responds that “For a while I was, Bill.”
Meaning when he thought Adama was going to die?
That’s… uncharacteristically sappy of you, Tigh. And I can’t be held responsible for the consequences:
Adama does a bit of speechifying to the Marines who were about to kill, and I guess he gets them on his side, because they all (except the main one) march to the CIC to deal with Zarek and Gaeta.
Meanwhile Tyrol is still crawling through tunnels. This episode must’ve been fun for the actor.
Zarek calls up Roslin and tells her that both Tigh and Adama are dead, and if you thought you would get her to surrender, BOY, YOU ARE SO WRONG. I’ve dealt with a lot of sadness this episode, but this scene with Roslin had me staring at my screen in utter glee. She’s basically like
with a pinch of
and a whole heaping side of
It is, in a word, splendid.
Gaeta and Zarek are about to jump the part of the fleet loyal to them away, but it turns out Tyrol’s been aiming for the FTL drives, which he disables at the very last minute. Props to him for immediately figuring out “Hey, wouldn’t it be good if the mutineers couldn’t take the Galactica and run away?” Though after he’s had his great heroic moment he sees a crack in the wall. Some sort of inner hull breach? Whatever it is, it doesn’t look good.
By this point Gaeta’s realized it’s over. Adama will use his skin for a washcloth. He orders, against Zarek’s urgings, that the ship stop preparing to shoot the Basestar. Adama gets to the CIC and… yep, everything’s over. Gaeta and Zarek surrender.
Roslin and Adama have a reunion, and my moment of happiness—you’ve done so well this episode, my pair of badasses—is halted by the scene that broke my soul.
That would be the Gaeta/Batlar friendship scene. Show, how dare you slam me with a brOTP when Gaeta has minutes left to live. He tells Baltar about his childhood aspirations—at first he wanted to be an architect, and later he came to love science. He even thought he was good at it, “until I met you.”
Baltar’s face. You can tell that ripped out his heart and stomped on it, because he really does care about Baltar. Even when Baltar was a little sh*t like 90% of the time, they must’ve gotten to know each other on New Caprica. There were all the sycophants and the people who wanted to use Baltar for their own purposes—and he absolutely cooperated with that, and encouraged it, because narcissism. But Gaeta was probably the only person in his life whom he could even remotely think of as his friend. And now they both know Gaeta’s going to die.
But Gaeta’s calm. Almost detached. He even jokes with Baltar, making self-deprecating comments about his childhood dreams of making restaurants shaped like food. “I’m fine how things have worked out,” says Gaeta. “Really, I am. I just hope that people realize eventually who I am.” Baltar tells him that he does.
Gaeta and Zarek are taken to the execution chamber, and as if my feels aren’t bad enough already Baltar’s there. He’s always taken the easy path, and no one—including Gaeta—would blame him for not being there in Gaeta’s last moment. But he stays. Gaeta faces his death with dignity. And right before he’s shot the pain/itching/whatever in his missing leg stops.
Did Starbuck and Romo get Anders to Doc Cottle in time? What’s the crack that Tyrol saw in the ship? What was with that weird Cylon? What’ll happen with the government now that the Quorum (minus Lee) is dead? What will Adama do to the people (OK, I’m really only concerned about Racetrack) who worked with Gaeta? At this point I don’t even care. Felix Gaeta, this goes out to you:
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Through the magic of lenticular printing—you know, those pictures with two separate images on them, and you switch back and forth by moving it around—Brooklyn-based startup gifpop is printing the pinnacle of human artistic achievement: The gif. Yes, you can upload your own, though the limit is ten frames. You can even choose two still images—like, for instance, happy Bilbo and Bilbo flipping everyone off. There has to be a catch, like you’re not allowed to use gifs from copyrighted material or something. The website doesn’t specify, but the universe cannot be good enough to allow me to have a physical copy of Nathan Fillion being judgey to carry around with me, close to my heart.